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Pornament

In Dil Se on February 8, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Two Karnataka ministers found watching porn in assembly. The news is all over the net and I find it utterly funny. The ministers should know that they are videotaped and are telecasted live. Still they find it all OK to hide their ‘smart phone’ below the desk and entertain their selves while the ‘entire’ assembly debates over important issues which are not even clear to news channels. Their negligence or arrogance is utterly hilarious.

But then looking at the entire event again I can’t find who to blame for this incidence.

Let’s say ministers were at fault. May be that’s why they offered their resignations. But then if there is a debate going on about Pakistan national flag hosted in a remote village or about a rave party in Udipi village, do these two ministers were getting really involved in the discussion? Or they were getting hell bored and decided to entertain their selves for some time? I mean we all go through such things every day. When there is a hopeless presentation going on or a meeting enthusiastically called for sheer time pass, we all turn to our cell phones, check Facebook/twitter/Blog etc. or play angry birds; watch clips and do any stuff closely ambiguous to what these ministers did during their free time. Obviously such boring assemblies are at fault which put our beloved ministers to torture of boredom.

Most of the Houses and Assemblies in central or state governments are over flooded with MLAs and MPs. The ministries fall short to cadre all the MLAs and MPs elected from huge number of constituencies. More over these elected representatives of India are made to attend all the assemblies and question hours which are adjourned most of the times for some trivial issues of national importance. Most of the times ministers are not even closely related to the issue and it does not concern a simple beggar of their vote bank or a single penny in their Swiss bank. Then why are they expected to give close audience to such mundane issues and not to turn towards their expensive-government sponsored-smart phones for some entertainment? Clearly the Assemblies have to be more entertaining and exciting to stop such incidences to happen again.

The Parliament Assemblies in India should go The Indian cricket way. The dull face of Indian cricket changed from Test to T20 with short and sweet format, bollywood glamour, corporate money, scarcely clothed cheer leaders and vivacious presenters. The government should employ such measures so that ministers can be kept hooked to the proceedings and will not be distracted to entertainment in hand. The plain khadi dress code should change to glamorous designer clothes. All the fights and quarrels should be appropriately backed up by cheer leaders employed by political parties so that the ministers can give a good fight to the ruling party. All such heated discussions should also be named after movies just like Aus-India test series was called as “Agnipath” series. This will enunciate the emotions and purpose of the government bills into the minds of Indian citizens who are more interested in Movies than in politics. For female MLAs and MPs there should be an age limit and only hot and young ladies should be allowed to participate in the elections which will certainly increase the attendance of our sex starved politicians and give them purpose to take part in proceedings. The corporate houses should sponsor the question hours and whenever the assembly is adjourned commercial advertisements of these corporate should be played on a big screen inside and outside of the parliament. A great burden over the tax payers’ money can be relieved by such simple measure.

I feel the incidence of porn in assembly is an alarm call for world’s biggest democracy to change its functioning. In fact the world has changed so much that these age old roman practices should be given a modern touch. I know I’ll get full support on my suggestions by Kapil Sibbal or Shashi Tharoor who meticulously tweet during parliament proceedings. It’s a war against the boredom of our ministers and entire India will unite against this torment.

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